Winter Wonders

Wednesday, November 29, 2017

This post is just for kicks. I did not come up with the template or any of the asked material. I thought it would be a great mix-up from my current content and thought it would be fun! To participate, most bloggers have been tagged to take part in this blog challenge. I however was not, but still wanted to participate. A nice winter themed get to know me. Feel free to read and maybe try out the tag yourself!!

The Rules
  1. Share 12 random “About Me” facts
  2. Answer 12 questions
  3. Tag 12 Bloggers

Becoming Who I Was Always Meant To Be

I am lost, broken, afraid, scared of abandonment. I suffer from depression and bipolar disorder. I am overweight, insecure, irritable, degrading of myself, and sometimes I become enraged with fury.

I am also kind, caring, loving, sentimental, giving, emotional, loyal,looking out for the benefit of others, and empowering. As I take the time to work on myself I am discovering how I became to be who I am at this present moment. There have been many factors that have played their parts in shaping my habits, my behaviors and my personality. Some of the things I am grateful for possessing  and others I am less proud of. Because of the turmoil I've been through (minor to you, major to me), and the unhappiness I have experienced, 5 years ago, I made it my self administered task to dedicate my time to make necessary improvements to become a better me. In the past, I placed to much stock into what others thought of me and internalized their unpleasant interpretation of who they thought I was or who they wanted me to be. Their opinion of me, which was often times very negative, became my opinion of me. Even if somehow, on any given day, I felt good about myself, hearing others voice their belittling comments upon my name quickly led me  to second guess my 'goodness'. My intentions in the deepest of my being are nothing but sweetness and kindness to all. Similar to a pageant contestant giving her "I just want world peace" answer to a posed question by the judges, lol. Although my intentions are good, I do not always convey them in this way.


Sincerely, YWG: Letters to Fairfield

Monday, November 6, 2017

Personal notes of my life with you. Some stories may be hard to believe or understand, but they are my true, complete, bare naked feelings about our time together from the beginning until the end. Hopefully one day we will each be able to look back on this time and have grown as individuals. It is my hope that thru all of our life experiences together and apart, we will one day be able to truly forgive ourselves and each other for the pain we caused to one another.

I love you I do,



Never Can Say Goodbye: All Falls Down Part 2

Wednesday, November 1, 2017

Time has gone by and my friend is no longer in a titled relationship. We have been spending 4 to 5 days in one another’s presence.  I have grown to take a liking to this handsome man and my feelings are growing stronger with each coming day.  The time we spend together is amazing. Foot rubs and forehead kisses are in constant rotation and the conversation is endless. From politics, to television shows, to family & friends, to celebrity gossip and future goals; there was never a moment of silence between us.  But as time kept moving, I became more and more paranoid, more and more insecure in our friendship. I wanted more and he was unwilling to commit on a deeper level. He had been hurt so badly in the past, that he was very cautious and slow to make those bigger steps.


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